


The Truth

by terryreviews



Series: Ezira and Anthony [10]
Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:35:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 8,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22595653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/terryreviews/pseuds/terryreviews
Summary: They are moving in together, life seems to be developing and really turning into something wonderful. But still, there are odd things, unexplained things, that Reader notices. Always feeling one step behind, not in the on the joke, this is what happens when Reader learns the truth. Needless to say, it won't be easy to deal with it.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)/Reader
Series: Ezira and Anthony [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1426378
Comments: 84
Kudos: 149





	1. Moving In

**Author's Note:**

> I'm honestly unsure of exactly everything that will happen in this story but it WILL have angst/anger and all kinds of unpleasant things. There will be fluff (as that is mostly the goal for the series at large) but the truth will have to be revealed eventually.

Your back throbbed, sweat rolled in itchy beads down your spine, collected under your breasts and underarms, as you dropped the final box.

“Why the fuck did we decide to do this at the beginning of summer?” You groused as your back popped for the millionth time.

“Language,” Ezira half-chided as he easily relocated a stack of three boxes to the living room. How strong was he? It was always impressive and inspiring of a good long “HOW!” when Ezira used his low key strength to do things that either you or Anthony couldn't. When you were packing your belongings, he insisted that, even though you insisted on dispersing them, he could handle boxes full of books.

“ _But that'll be too heavy! You're supposed to pack books with other things that are lighter.”_

“ _Angel can handle it. How do you think all those books got into the shop? Remember that stack he came balancing the other day? He's got it.” Anthony had insisted while helping you fold clothes into a suitcase._

“ _Does he lift or something when we're not looking?”_

_Anthony merely laughed but offered no answer._

“Come on, it's hot. If ever there was a time for swearing now would be the time. Million fucking degrees. I'm going to get some water.” You wiped your forehead with the back of your hand doing nothing to help either as they were both sweaty and headed to the kitchen.

You hadn't unpacked anything, let alone the glasses, so you turned on the faucet and dipped your head under the stream of cool water. Letting it run through your hair, turning your face to take in some gulps.

“Not too cold! You're overheated, make sure that the water isn't too cold!” You heard Ezira call from the other room.

You knew better than to argue and turned the hot knob to make the water lukewarm. “Why?” You called back, grumpy at having the refreshing cold altered but still alternated between drinking it and letting it run over your face, scalp, and back of your neck.

“It can put your body into shock if you're hot and the water you drink is too cold. You haven't been drinking as much as you should have,” Ezira was suddenly next to you, “so I wanted to prevent anything from happening. When you are rested and cooled down, then you may have the water colder.”

You couldn't help but grin. Turning off the knobs you whipped your head back, causing a spray of water to fly out and sloshing down your back.

“Y/N, really?”

Before Ezira could go into full scolding mode, you grabbed the front of his shirt and tugged him down for a quick kiss.

“Thanks for looking out for me,” you gave another quick kiss and headed back to the main room where all of the boxes had gathered.

“Why did we have to have so much shit?” Anthony asked you when he spotted you coming from the other room.

“Because we're all greedy and didn't want to throw anything out?” You teased, coming over to where he had flopped onto the one piece of furniture that had been set up, a squashy, old, sofa with a floral print that the previous owners of the cottage had left.

While you weren't fond of the design, at least it was comfortable.

He grinned and let his head fall back, looking ready to doze. It was a little after noon and you all had been moving in for the past hour and a half. Before that, there was the long-ass drive where you all hastily ate a breakfast of one muffin apiece because both you and Anthony just wanted to get everything done as early and quickly as possible and didn't want to stop for a lengthy sit-down breakfast.

Now, you were hot, tired, and very hungry. All you wanted to do right now was curl up, have a snack, and then pass out.

“Want to take a break and go into town, get something to eat?” Anthony asked Ezira as he too came back into the room.

“That would be wonderful. Feeling a bit peckish.”

You gave an overdramatic whine, “ahhhh, more fucking driving. No. Just let me curl up and die right here. My arms feel like jello anyway.”

They both gave a little laugh and both pushed you back to your feet with Ezira gently pulling you up by your arms and Anthony pushing you up with a cheeky grab of your ass.

“Come on dear, go take a quick shower and you can sleep in the car.”

“Fine!” You pouted and headed to the shower.

There was no soap or shampoo, but letting the cool water run over your skin for ten minutes, rining away the sweat, was good enough.

“Hey, one of you bring me a towel and some clothes please!” You called when you realized that, in your sleepy state you hadn't taken anything out.

“Here you are love,” Ezira placed the requested items on the sink, “after lunch,” he said as he watched you towel off, “we'll come back and at least get the bed set up. If you're still tired, we can have a nap. The unpacking, properly, can happen tomorrow.”

“We should also get some snacks in case we wake up in the middle of the night. Some easy things too to make in the morning for breakfast. Where's Anthony by the way?”

“Relaxing on the couch.”

“Do either of you want to shower before we leave?” You tugged on your panties and sports bra.

“That won't be necessary.”

You leaned forward and exaggerated sniffing at him.

“Damn, even you sweaty smells good. How much product do you and Anthony put on that you aren't even sweating?”

He fumbled for a moment for an answer, “ah, well it isn't that hot and if you use enough powder it can help absorb the sweat.”

“Careful what power you use. If it has talcum you shouldn't use it, can cause cancer.”

“I'll bear that in mind,” he said and from seeming out of nowhere he produced a brush and began brushing your hair as you pulled up a pair of shorts. It was something he liked to do with Anthony, play/brush his hair. You often walked in on him washing the other's hair. It wasn't often he did it for you or for you to let him.

“I'm going to hack this all off,” you growled when he hit a snarl.

“I think you'd look lovely with short hair.”

“Thanks.”

“Of course,” he kissed your shoulder and you pulled your shirt over your head.

“Alright, I'm ready.” you yawned and followed Ezira out of the room where you both collected Anthony.

“Babe, you ever bothered you do all the driving?” You asked Anthony as you slipped into the back seat.

Anthony pressed a hand to his chest like you mortally wounded him, “me? Tired of driving? Never.”

He snapped his fingers (something he and Ezira seemed to do at odd times for no reason) and you noticed that the trailer that had been hooked up to the Bentley for the move was left behind as you peeled out to head to town.


	2. Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to add a bit of fluff. The calm before the storm. I know that there are going to be more fluffy bits but this, this is just a small, intimate, sweet slice of a chapter.

Home. You thought as you packed your shopping away. The first time you bought groceries for your home.

Home. A properly established corner of the world for you and the two men you loved. Not an apartment, nor a flat above a shop, a  _home_ .

Once everything was put away, you decided to head to the bedroom. Your's, Ezira's, and Anthony's bedroom. As you passed through the kitchen, the main living room, you saw all the unpacked boxes, the empty spaces where furniture would go, and felt your insides pleasantly flip.

You stopped in the doorway of the bedroom and watched as Anthony and Ezira smoothing down the crème colored comforter on the massive bed. The only piece of furniture currently in the room. The looked up when you entered.

“Ah,” you said when you had their attention, “got it ready for me,” and immediately turned around to run back down the length of the haul trying not to laugh. You turned heel and then ran full tilt all the way back to the room, leaping at the door and promptly landing in the middle of the bed with a satisfying thump.

Anthony laughed and fell in next to you, followed by Ezira on the opposite side.

You wrapped an arm around each of them and pulled them down tot he bed which they gamely allowed.

“Nap time!” You released them so you could adjust into the bed more properly and then, on your belly, you reached behind you to pull an arm each of their's over your back.

“What are you an old lady? Going to bed so soon?” Anthony teased, but you felt him shift closer to you burying his face into your shoulder.

“Thankfully you've enforced the “shoes by the front door please” policy or this might be a smidgen uncomfortable,” Ezira took advantage of his height and put his chin on top of your head as he snuggled into you.

“I'll get a shoe rack later. Or I'll make one. Something.” You said with a yawn. “And by the way, _old lady_ , nah. I'm more like a crabby toddler that just had their lunch and now needs their nap.” You could feel Anthony smile against you and Ezira's responding chuckle rumble through his chest.

As you all began to relax, eyes growing heavy, you mumbled into the pillow, a mixture of bashful and afraid that this would all end poorly,

“Welcome home guys.”

“You too love,” Ezira pressed a kiss to your head, Anthony to your cheek.


	3. Puttering Around

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of filler but still, here is something to build up to the more heavy emotional things that are going to come.

“Done!” You slumped against the counter, dabbing your forehead with the back of your hand. A/C or no, lifting and dropping things for over two hours was going to do that to you. You’d volunteered to take the the kitchen. Pans, pots, silverware, a very large assortment of mugs, wine glasses, and tea cups all having to find their own homes in the now stuffed cabinets. Not to mention the dinner wear set that Anthony and Ezira had apparently been given by friends of their’s you had yet to meet (though you’d seen the postcards and such come through the post) that had four large plates, four small plates, four large bowls, four medium bowls made of heavy glass wear. 

Thankfully you had gotten rid of most of your own kitchen accessories and items, giving them away to people in your apartment building. Anthony’s microwave, toaster oven, mixer, blender, and so forth were all state of the art and much more sleek anyways. Almost decorative with either their shiny red or black coloring in a line on the counter. Unfortunately the old place only had one outlet on the counter. There would be unplugging and re-plugging of devices. The most you kept were your odd and end mugs from places either you visited, or were gifted to you by people that had visited different places. People that you never bothered to talk to you anymore but hey, how could you pass up mugs from Disney World?

It had taken a while to get everything unpacked and between you and Anthony’s impatience at wanting things done, both of you had woken relatively early and began unpacking fairly quickly without breakfast, much to Ezira’s chastising He, currently, was working on the main living room (after he’d cooked breakfast for himself and made a point of eating it in front of you and Anthony as you both worked around him pretending not to care). 

Picking up your cellphone you found it was 11:30am. Not bad. All that needed to happen now was to set up the table and the kitchen would truly be done. You remembered when you had to unscrew the legs from an old round one from Ezira’s place that had been buried under stacks of books in the very bowls of the shop. _Oh, that will be a perfect enought able. Nice and small. Don’t know where the chairs could have gotten to_ he had said when he helped you dig it out. 

Thankfully, you all were planning to buy some new funiture today. All the boxes were being upacked, the items organized, but the bookshelves, save for your little battered one (which Ezira was currently placing your small collection in), would have to be measured for the correct space and the design agreed upon between all of you. Hopefully something basic with the pretense of a wooden design that would appease both Anthony and Ezira. In truth, you didn’t care so much as most of your own furniture came used save for your wonderful bed which you were loathe to get rid of in favor of the larger bed you all had now. Though Anthony placated you by ensuring that there were drawers for the base (you already called dibs and they agreed) and the mattress itself would be the most comfortable, spine supporting thing you could ever want.

“I think we should take this outside and paint it, what do you think my dear?” Ezira asked when you came into the living room just as a piece of old paint flaked off of your bookcase.

“Nah, too hot for that and besides, it has a sort of rustic charm to it being trashed.”

“That,” he accepted a glass of water, “and you’re too lazy to want to do the work.” He smirked when you made an affronted noise and lightly pinched his arm for that.

“Who’s too lazy,” Anthony appeared at the corner. He’d been unpacking things for the bathroom and bedroom.

“Y/N, doesn’t want to take the twenty minutes it would take to paint the shelf.”

“It’s my shelf and I like the battered, used look,” you defended.

Anthony looked at it, “hmm,” made a show of thinking, “we could paint it TARDIS blue. Half the books on there are classics and Doctor Who.”

That was an idea, but you squashed down the excitement knowing that it would mean more work and doubled down, “it’s fine the way it is. You guys are picking or supplying the majority of the furniture as it is, let me have my piece of shit bookcase.”

Anthony held up his hand, “okay, okay. Just an idea.” 

“Did you want to go to the furniture store with us?” Ezira asked, voice raising in that way that signified he already knew the answer.

“Fuck no. Last thing I want to do is walk around dozens of isles looking for a bookshelf with a person’s name. I mean, we don’t really need any furniture beyond that.”

“There are nightstands to go on either side of the sofa (perhaps a covering for the sofa now that I think on it), an armchair, maybe two, nightstands to go on either side of the bed, bookshelves, and a coffee table. And that’s just what I can think of at the moment. We may discover we need more once we are there.” Ezira listed off, standing.

Anthony added, “Standing wardrobe, you didn’t want to take yours from the shop and bring it here and I had a walk in closet for my stuff. Got all the stuff in sorted piles on the bed right now because _someone,”_ he glanced at you and you looked away feigning innocence, “claimed the drawers under the bed. Maybe we should look into making an expansion for a walk in closet and a master bath.”

It was odd that they managed to even have enough space to pack their clothes. One wardrobe would not be enough between them. 

“We just moved in and you’re already talking about renovating,” you laughed.

“Got to think big. I’m sure we could get it done in a few days. Between our drives,” Anthony started,

“and impatience,” Ezira added.

Anthony continued, “we could have it done pretty quickly. Or hire people to have it done quickly. I’ve seen tv shows were they get houses up within a few days. A walk-in closet and bathroom should be no problem. In fact,” he looked at Ezira, “when we’re out, there’s got to be a place where we can put in an order. I have all the measurements and photos.”

Ezira made a considering noise, “I suppose that would be a good idea. Between you and I, we have quite the expansive assortment of clothes and I shudder to think how wrinkled they are in that pile on the bed.”

He let out a sigh and looked at the room with everything taken out, stacked or tucked away in corners, but still chaotic and disorganized, “we should get going. We can pick the things out and hopefully have them sorted by tonight.”

Anthony snapped and had his keys. You didn’t think you saw him reach into his pocket but ignored it.

“Want anything at the store sweetheart while we’re out? Anything you think we need?” He asked as he dangled the keys in his hand.

“Nah, I’m okay. I’ll putt around here and see what I can do. Probably put my clothes away.”

“Alright, if you think of anything, give us a call yeah?” He gave you a kiss on the lips.

“Don’t strain yourself, darling, trying to find something to do. We can’t do much until we have the furniture as it is. Feel free to take a break, watch videos or something on your phone,” Ezira assured, also giving you a kiss.

Anthony gave a small wave, Ezira a little nod, and then you were alone in the home.

You looked around the place, uncertain what to do. As Ezira rightfully pointed out, until there was furniture to put things on or in, there wasn’t much point in your trying to find spots for things.

The most you could do was put away your clothes. 

On the bed, there were three piles, one for each of you. Yours, arguably, was the most diverse of all of you given you had more color. Yes, there were plenty of t-shirts and darker colors, but there were at least more colors than Ezira’s or Anthony’s clothes. Anthony’s were mostly gray and black, Ezira’s various shades of brown and white. For the most part.

You let yourself flip through some of their outfits, pausing every now and again on items that you thought they’d look particularly good in, before getting down to the task at hand. Sorting through and putting away your clothes.

Which took all of twenty minutes. Bored and alone, you decided to watch videos as Ezira had suggested. No telling when they’d be back. You could probably get through a lot of material.

A thought occurred to you and you went to the front window and looked out. The hauling truck was left behind. That was odd. How were they going to get so much stuff if they only had the Bentley? The Bentley was stylish, not roomy.

You shook it off and went to the bedroom, flopped down the bed, pushing down your curiosity, your creeping sense of something off, and turned on YouTube.


	4. Eyes in the Window

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it has been a long time coming for a new chapter and I'm sorry I made you all wait so long. I promise I have not abandoned this series or this particular story I'm just not sure exactly where to bring the conflict. They have to confess to Us at some point what they are and that is going to lead to a lot of potential crisis and angst to be honest. That may get heavy and as such, I've left the tags fairly sparse. 
> 
> The tags may be updated, as the rating, depending on where exactly I bring this story. I'm desperately trying to avoid certain cliches that would make Ezira and Anthony reveal themselves under deress (like reader gets attacked or something like that) but at the same time, with the way things are going, I don't know.
> 
> I hope honestly that, wherever it goes, you will all find it an engaging ride. 
> 
> Thank you, as always, for sticking with this story.

Above the volume of your phone were the muffled chirps of birds and the barley there hum of the air conditioner to keep you company as you idly scrolled through videos.

It had been several hours since they'd left and you were getting restless without their company. You liked your alone time sure but this was your new place and you enjoyed just sharing space with your favorite boys. You tossed around on the bed but eventually you needed something else to do.

Hopping off the bed you decided to find a book. You wanted to go for a walk but didn't want to go alone, in the heat, without sunblock. Instead, you headed to the living room with its many disorganized stacks to find something that might keep you entertained for the time being. While you had your own pile of books, you decided, since he was out, you'd take a peek at the collection Ezira had brought with him. You made sure to put them exactly back as you found them lest Ezira find out you were pawing his precious first editions. Oh, not that he never let you read his books, of course not. He was more than happy to share them with you...provided they never left the shop and he was always there to watch you while you did so. After all, he'd witnessed your less than careful treatment of your own books. 

It did amuse you, but still, you were very, very, gentle with each one.

A number of the works he brought with him were thrillers and spy novels. He'd always had a thing for the genre and his logic was it would help add a bit of excitement to the pastoral surroundings if he had tales of double agents and code words to pass the time. He, no doubt, would add to, and diversify, his collection as time went on. He'd been over the moon when Anthony had gotten him a "welcome home" gift about a week before you were all due to move. A boxset of classic 007 movies with a whole host of behind the scenes features and commentary tracks. You teased him at the time saying _"you only got him those because you wanted to watch them"_ to which he replied _"I don't know about you, but we're going to be relatively isolated. Stuck with each other. Don't know about you but I'd like more to watch than Shakespeare in the Park and opera_." It had made sense.

You agreed. You liked a mixture of things and were fairly open to newer experiences, but tended to gravitate towards scifi and fantasy. Action and horror often did cross paths with those genres. So, watching James Bond swirl shaken martinis and shoot things was more fun than watching teenagers with a thirst so strong they ended up dying for it.

You giggled to yourself. Ezira _hated_ when you distilled Shakespeare into such trivial, modern, terms and you always had to try to keep a straight face when he popped off on the artistic importance and social nuance and historical significance of Shakespeare's work in a rebuttal to your base observations.

Eventually you wound up selecting one of your own books you hadn't gotten around to reading yet and were just about to head back to the bedroom to plop down and read it when something caught your eye.

"AH!" you fell on your ass when you saw a face peeping in at you through the kitchen window, black voids where the eyes should be.

Instantly it was gone. Your heart hammering in your chest, you legs shaking as you rose, you clutched your tattered paperback to your chest. 

You didn't know what to do. You didn't consider yourself particularly brave. Not cowardly, but not brave either, and so you retreated, running full tilt down the hall, slamming the bedroom door behind you, locking it tight.

You couldn't pull the blanket over your head with all the clothes and so settled for burrowing underneath them, hiding. 


	5. We'll Keep You Safe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay safe and sane.

Huddled in a cocoon of clothes your mind frantically searched for a solution. Was there an intruder out there trying to get in? You didn't hear breaking glass or the door being forced. Did they scamper off? Did you imagine those black eyes?

No.

No, you didn't imagine it. Someone or something had looked in.

What if they were still out there? Waiting. You had to call the boys.

Wearing one of their jackets over your head, you began searching for your phone, scrambling around on the bed, tearing through clothes, the blanket, the sheets, becoming more and more desperate when you couldn't find it.

Unwanted tears filled your eyes and you tried not to let choked sounds escape but your sobs broke loose regardless. Your heart in your throat.

Finally, you found the device on the floor next to the bed. Snatching it up, you quick dialed Anthony's phone.

It rang twice.

"Hey babe."

You wished just hearing his voice would be enough to calm you.

You opened your mouth, no sound came out.

"Babe?" When you still didn't answer, Anthony's voice became more urgant, "Y/N, you okay?"

"Is she alright?" You heard Ezira ask.

"S...someone was here." You whispered. You remembered the windows next to the bed, feeling ice cold as you braced and whipped around to look at them. No one there.

"Someone?" Anthony had put you on speaker.

You took a breath, sniffled, "someone had been looking through the window. In," you swallowed, gaining momentum, "in the kitchen."

"What!?" You couldn't be sure who said it. Maybe both.

"I," you licked your lips, salty with your fallen tears, "I locked myself in the bedroom. I haven't heard anything but they might be outside. Be careful when you come home."

You heard a squeal, loud in the phone and Ezira's answering yelp.

"We're almost there, hold on," Anthony said.

"We'll stay on the phone until we're there."

"Okay," your heart rate was beginning to finally settle, knowing that they were on their way. The _guest_ was probably long gone, they'd be safe coming home, and you wouldn't be alone. 

You didn't speak as you held your phone against your ear, just concentrated on your breathing, hearing the rumble of the Bentley through the small speaker, and Ezira's soothing, "we're almost there dear. We're in the driveway now."

From inside the bedroom, hunkered down in their clothes, you couldn't hear the car, but in the phone you heard them open and shut the doors, the rumple of clothes.

You listened, holding your breath.

Then, from down the hall, you heard your name called out,

"Y/N!" Anthony's panic evident even through the muffling of door and clothes.

In a flash you tossed off the blanket, dropped your phone, and lept out of bed. A sharp spike of pain as you rolled your ankle shot up your leg, but you pushed passed it and stumbled to the door. It took three tries for your fingers to twist the lock and fling open the door.

Both Ezira and Anthony half way down the hall.

You stared at each other for a moment before you forced yourself to run forward, wrapping your arms around Ezira who was closest and then yanking Anthony down by his shirt collar into the hug.

You buried your face.

"Shh, love," you heard Anthony say, feeling his hand run along the back of your scalp, through your hair.

"You're safe now."

"You didn't see anyone?" You asked after a moment, pulling back and rubbing your face with the back of your hand. 

"No," Ezira assured.

"Anthony, are you holding a tire iron?" You looked up into his face, sunglasses blocking his eyes.

"Fuck yeah. Someone breaking into my house, terrorizing my girlfriend, fucker's lucky he ran off."

You giggled, an awkward, watery sound.

"Meanwhile I fucking ran away."

Ezira tisked and Anthony scoffed.

"There is no shame in being scared. You were alone and unarmed. I think you were smart, running away and hiding." Ezira gave a squeeze to your hip.

Anthony caught your chin with his finger and raised your face. He gave you a small kiss, "we would rather have you safe than brave."

"I mean, maybe I over reacted," before you could finish, Anthony kissed you again and Ezira kissed your cheek.

"You did no such thing," Ezira assured, "you have no idea what that person would have done had they not run off. Could have been a home invader. Probably thought no one was home and when they saw you, took off. But there was a real possibility that they wouldn't have. You did not over react."

You buried your face again and squeezed them to you.

"Want to tell us the whole story?" Anthony asked, rubbing circles into your back.

You saw a flash of those black eyes in your mind and hesitated. How stupid would that sound if you told them? Still, what would they do? Would they believe you?

Fuck it.

You told them the whole thing, trying to keep it straight to the point, and rushed through the black eyed detail so quickly rather than embellish it that Ezira had you pull back.

"What was that?" He looked at Anthony, who looked at him and then right back to you.

"You saw what?" Anthony prompted.

You bit your lip and said, "it's stupid. I...I know but...it had...black eyes. Like...pure black eyes. That's what scared me the most. It was probably contacts or something. Something to scare me." You finished lamely.

Ezira and Anthony looked at each other and seemed to communicate silently with each other before Anthony said, "hey, why don't you and I go sit in the living room for a while. We'll get something to snack on and we'll watch videos together."

"Where's Ezira going?"

"Oh, just outside dear. I'm going to go around the grounds, make sure the man is in fact gone."

"But you can't go out alone! What if he's out there? What if he's got a weapon?"

Ezira kissed your nose and almost miraculously you felt utterly calm and warm and at peace, almost giddy in fact. And compliant as you let them lead you back to the living room.

"I promise you, I will be quite fine." And you just believed him.

Suddenly, you found yourself curled up on the couch with Anthony, a cup of frozen hot chocolate in your hand. Where did that even come from?

Anthony was already pulling up funny videos on his phone.

"Be careful Angel," Anthony said, mindfully. 

"Where is your spray bottle?" Ezira asked.

Anthony snapped his fingers, "on the kitchen counter."

Ezira nodded and over the sound of the first video you heard the water run from the tap and some vague...sweet...barely there kind of...peaceful music before he returned, spray bottle in hand and very much full.

A part of your mind questioned why he was going out with a spray bottle of all things, but the majority of you was saying _don't worry about it. You're safe and their safe and don't question a thing. Just feel cozy and happy and loved and watch silly videos. Anything you'd like_.

"Be back in a tick," He smiled at you before heading out the door.

"Please," a flash of unease came through you, "he shouldn't be going out on his own."

Anthony ran a hand down your shoulder and that spell of calm descended on your mind again and Ezira's potential danger melted from your mind as you snuggled into Anthony's chest.

"He'll be okay love, he'll be just fine. Just stay here with me and I'll keep you safe."


	6. Demanding Answers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is going to lead into another, deeper, chapter where I will do my best to cover the crisis that the Reader will be going through once the Truth is revealed.
> 
> It is getting closer and I'm not entirely sure how to tag it but it is coming. Discussions of Heaven, Hell, and Earth, the notions that they could have manipulated Reader, that kind of thing. My own personal biases will bleed into it. I don't know how, but I know they will be in there.

Cup empty, belly full of junk food, cozy against Anthony's chest, you idly watched through videos he clicked on. Just as a cat stole a loaf of bread, the door opened and Ezira came in. Both you and Anthony lifted your heads, a huge wave of relief filling your heart at seeing him.

"Anything?" Anthony asked.

"No," Ezira closed the door and moved to where you were. "However, I did lay down some," he eyed you, " _precautions_."

You sat up, followed by Anthony.

Your mind wasn't as warm and peaceful as it had been earlier when you first sat down. You were still calm but more alert, questions rising in your mind once more.

"With a spray bottle?" You asked.

Uncharacteristic of both of them, they ignored you and you felt Anthony tense against your shoulder where you were touching.

"Think it was enough?" He asked Ezira, concerned.

"I believe," Ezira said, fidgeting with his hands, "that it will need some reinforcement."

Anthony nodded and stood up, kissing the top of your head and pushing the phone gently into your hands.

"Why don't you show Angel the cat video playlist we were watching, hm?" He began to head to the door, taking the spray bottle from Ezira.

You lept up, phone falling to the floor, "sorry," you said, scrambling to pick it up, hands shaking, "you're going out now too?"

Ezira raised his hands up, placating, "I promise you dear that there is nothing out there that will hurt Crowley. I went," he glanced at Anthony, "around the perimeter. You'll be able to see it."

Anthony glanced at you, back to Ezira, even with his sunglasses you could tell he was trying to mind what he was saying in front of you. They both were. "I'll find it. Been a while since I've had to..." he hesitated..."but I think that I can manage. Did you _mark_ anything?"

Ezira nodded, "I struggled but I etched some wards into trees and into the dirt. Temporary. We'll need to think of something more permanent."

"What are you talking about!" You didn't mean to raise your voice. You really didn't. But they were ignoring you. Talking circles, nonsense. Wards? Precautions? Spray bottles? What was going on.

Startled, they both jumped and looked to you. Then back at each other.

Ezira moved to wrap his arm around your shoulder and you, for the very first time, lept back. 

You couldn't explain it, but on top of your frustration at being left out of whatever it was they were talking about, you got the feeling that if you let Ezira hug you...you'd lose your train of thought, you'd lose your answers. As much as seeing the flash of hurt on his face had been, you needed to stand firm.

"I'm...I'm sorry but...I want answers. What's going on. Why did you leave with a spray bottle? What are you talking about with...with _wards?_ Are you, like, into witchcraft or something like that? Why didn't you bring the hauling," you couldn't think of the word as your emotions grew, " _thing_ when you went out? I mean...what...why...what aren't you telling me?" You felt your heart in your throat as you stumbled through your questions, exhilarated at finally giving voice to the sense that something was off, at having the chance to do so and not feel like you were imagining or over thinking things. At the same time, as they looked at you, with faces paler than ghosts, you couldn't help the nausious, nervous, crawling in your stomach at what the answers might be.

They looked at each other for a long while. Having their private little non-verbal conversations before Anthony let out a very long sigh and Ezira's shoulders slumped.

"Let Crowley go around the house first. We'll watch videos, you and I, on the couch. When he comes back, we will explain what is going on."

You crossed your arms tight around your chest in a self hug and mumbled, "I'm not going to like the answer am I?"

"No." Anthony said clearly, sharp, sad.

Ezira shook his head, eyes downcast, "I don't believe so."

You looked down at your feet and squeezed yourself tighter, drawing in a long breath. When you lifted your head again you said, "okay. Do what you got to do Anthony. We'll...we'll prolong the inevitable conversation while you're outside. Got to get some snuggle time in with Ezira since you had me to yourself for an hour," you managed a smile smile, "and...and after you get back in...we'll talk."

Anthony moved swiftly, pulling you into his arms before you could blink, hugging you to his chest, squeezing you tight.

"No matter what, I want you to know before anything else, we love you so much. Okay. No matter what. Please don't doubt it." 

Slowly, you wrapped your arms around his skinny waist and reciprocated, letting your face mush into his chest, feeling his trembling. He was scared.

"I...I promise, no matter what, I won't stop loving you guys." You said, wanting so desperately to believe that it was the truth as you savored what might be your last hug with one of the men you loved so much.

"Don't make promises you might not be able to keep," Anthony said before pulling back. Through the lens of his glasses you could just barely make out his eyes as he studied you. They looked off. You let him kiss you then before he let you go completely and said to Ezira, "better get your hugs and stuff too angel." He gave one last look to you both before he left.

Left alone with Ezira, you shuffled your feet awkwardly before gesturing to the couch, "guess we better make good on that snuggle time eh?" your legs felt like lead as you forced them to carry you to the couch, onto which you flopped.

Ezira said nothing for a moment, didn't move, before eventually taking his place against the arm of the couch and coaxing you to lay back onto his chest while he wrapped an arm around you.

"Crowley is right," he said as you got the phone ready, "we do love you very much." He kissed the back of your head and you let yourself relax against him, your arm over his, but other wise saying nothing as the videos began to play.


	7. What do you Believe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is not the full explination thing yet. I know that it has been a long while since I have updated, but slow and steady wins the race. My attentions are scattered to other fandoms/stories but I promise you that I most assuredly am still really into working on this story, my brain just gets very hyper focused and when it comes to angst/heavier things (like the next few chapters are going to be) I find myself at a stand still and rather anxious on how to proceed because I really want to make it fit the characters, the views, and so forth. I need to bring my A game (as much as my A game is actually worth) and given the philosophical implications going forward...well.
> 
> I will hint that I do have a Jeff Goldblum joke coming in the future chapters. You'll understand when I get there :)

It could have been any cozy afternoon. With Ezira's arm around your waist, his soft body against your back, and having gone from silly videos to a documentary with a soothing voiced narrator, you were warm, calm, safe. All but cured of the pervasive sense of dred.

That was until the front door opened.

Anthony came in, he wasn't looking at either you or Ezira as he shut the door behind him. From his avoidance and from the way Ezira stiffened behind you, they didn't want to have this conversation as much as you didn't.

You took the phone from Ezira (who's stronger/longer arm had been holding it since you both curled up on the couch) and turned it off. The silence in the room more than uncomfortable. A chill went down your spine and your stomach sank as Anthony spoke.

"I reinforced your marks with my own. We'll get a fence. Hang charms and carve wards into it."

Ezira said, "we'll have to remember to include exceptions for each other. I'm afraid I forgot mine. So, for the time being my dear, you are stuck here."

Anthony adjusted his glasses, looking forward down the hall and mumbled, "you too."

Ezira sighed, "worse places to be trapped than here I suppose." He sat up, "we'll fix it later."

You sat up, followed by Ezira. The tension and silence grew with Anthony running a hand through his hair, jaw clenched, Ezira fidgetting with his hands in his lap, pointedly looking down rather than at you when you tried to catch his eye.

You looked at Anthony, back to Ezira, before sighing and jumping to your feet.

"Welp, we've got to start somewhere we this conversation," you said with false cheeriness, "so," you floundered for a moment, "uh, I guess you guys can like...sit on the couch and I'll stand here and you can answer my questions."

Ezira and Anthony's gazes met each other, worry in both their expressions. But, Anthony did, slowly, make his way into the living room.

"Actually, Y/N," Ezira said, rising, taking Anthony's hand, "I think you may want to be seated for this."

Your heart did a little skip and you did your best to feign indifference, "oh, sure. No problem," you returned to the couch. Your butt on the edge of the cushion, your legs tense and pressed tightly together as you leaned, resting your forearms on your thighs, hands clenching together.

They seemed to share a silent conversation before Anthony let out a resigned sigh and asked, "Y/N, do you believe in God?"


	8. Look at my Eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It has been a long time. I promise you that I have not abandoned this story. I just get distracted with other things I'm interested in and given this (and next few) chapter(s) are more grounded/serious than the majority of this series and this story, I found it hard to sit down and write it. Legit have written....20 drafts and I still only have this meager offering to give you guys to let you know that I'm still alive. And I still think it is choppy *sigh*
> 
> Also, I struggled with the tone of the characters. Any author will tell you, sometimes you just lose the thread of your story, the characters, and it can take a bit to pick it back up.
> 
> As always, thank you for sticking with it, there will be more eventually.

"...God?" You asked. You pointed up at the ceiling with a singular finger, "as in?"

"Yes," Ezira fidgeted.

"How is that relevant?" You asked incredulously.

"Trust me babe," Anthony said, serious, "it's relevant."

"How? And where the hell is this coming from all of the sudden? We've never talked about religious things before?"

The two of them then looked at each other once more and began talking like you weren't there.

"This isn't going to get us anywhere," Anthony growled.

Ezira chided, "Patience is a virtue. We need to ease her into these concepts."

"Easing? if we just tell her and it'll be like pulling off a band aid. Deal with it then."

"And how are we just going to tell her? This isn't something that either of us have thought about."

"Hey!" You cut in before the bickering could go further, diverting their attention back to you, "just _tell_ her." You crossed your arms over yourself and waited.

"You won't believe us," Ezira warned.

"Try me!" You snapped, growing more anxious.

Anthony, also impatient, said, "okay Y/N," he whipped off his glasses and knelt in front of you, "look."

At first you had no idea what he meant.

"At what? You're just as handsome as ever," you teased, trying to add some humor to this uncomfortable situation.

His lip twitched, but he shook his head, "no, look...look at my eyes."

"What abou...ahhh!"


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Been a while as my time/whims carry me elsewhere. Rest assured, this is something that I'm still very in love with. Really and truly one of my favorite series to work on.

You flung yourself back into the couch, heart pounding as you stared wide eyed at Anthony's eyes. Not brown or green. Yellow. The pupils slits.

"What..." Once over the shock, you mustered, "contacts?" You thought back to the man with black eyes. Then your mind began to work. "Hey! Did you put that guy up to scare me? You have him wear freaky contracts and build me up until you do," you waved an accusing hand at him, "that is not funny!"

Anthony stared, clearly not expecting that reaction, "babe...they're not...they're not contacts."

That took longer to process.

"O...kay..." You mulled that over and went to the next conclusion, "so you've got an eye condition?"

"No!" He grew more flustered, stood, running a hand through his hair as he turned to Ezira, "angel," he said in a higher pitched, desperate tone.

"My dear," Ezira quickly swapped places with his husband, kneeling in front of you, and took your hand in both of his, "Crowley's eyes are not a defect nor condition. They are apart of him. I swear to you, this is not an elaborate game." The depths of sincerity in his eyes made your stomach squirm.

"Then," you whispered, "what is this?" 

"We aren't," Ezira paused, reluctant to go on, his face tense as he searched his mind for what he wanted to say and how to say it, "human."

You shook your head sharply as if it would organize your thoughts like banging an old tv to get a signal. There was no way you heard that correctly. A testament to how dumbfounded you were, you could only manage another, "what?"

Ezira dithered on his words, clearly wanting to fidget as he began to rub your hand, "I am an angel and Crowley is a demon."

All over you felt a sense of unease and cold. He was being serious and you checked that against your memories, the strange things around them. Still...

"There's no such thing," you were trembling, you withdrew your hand from his and brought your knees to your chest, hugging them tightly.

Ezira casted his eyes down and in a resigned voice said, "I'm afraid there is."

"I don't believe you." 

He stood then, "It's imperative that you do before anything else. We can't truly talk if you don't believe in us." He looked at Anthony then and they seemed to have a non-verbal conversation with just the barest twitch of eye brows and head jiggles.

"Prove it," you said, louder than intended, most likely due to the anxiety and the fact that you were left out of whatever they were communicating to each other, squeezing yourself tighter.

They reverted their attention back to you then, both seeming just as frightened as you were. 


	10. I Want to Lay Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, when I'm feeling way too much, I simultaneously get numb and a mixture of emotions that can only be quelled by sleeping. As if my feelings are so strong that I can't process them and they become vivid and distant all in one go. That's what I wanted to convey.

They both looked so adorably flustered that you had to resist the urge to get up and hug them. Despite all of your concerns, this splash of normalcy, the flash of affection it stirred in you, helped calm you. A little.

Anthony looked between Ezira and you and said, "We could always show you our wings."

Ezira balked, "don't you think that may be a stretch too far? Humans are not in the habit of sprouting feathered appendages."

"Well, talking isn't going to convince her!" Anthony said to you, "is it?" You shook your head. "See," he went back to Ezira, "we have to do something."

Ezira looked between you both. You knew how anxious your face was, it was reflected back in their anxiety. Feeding each other in a loop and you agreed. Whatever this was, you wanted...something. Something to help bring this to a head because whatever this was until the barrier was pushed back, nothing was going to get accomplished. 

"I asked you to prove it. Shock or no, you have to prove it because otherwise, we're going to be sitting here just...just staring at each other all day and night and I don't know about you but I don't want to do that. So..." You took a big breath, "do something!"

Ezira and Anthony exchanged one more look before Anthony said, "I'll do it."

He met your eyes and said, "Alright Y/N, before I do this, try to remember, it's me. Okay?"

Before you could ask what that meant, Anthony began to change. It was like watching a sci-fi show with an actual effects budget. The sounds of shifting bones and flesh in your ears as Anthony's legs fused together, his arms rescinded into his body, skin converted to scales, face becoming wide, melting and morphing until all that was left was a massive snake with a black back and red belly.

There was a pause. You stared at the snake, it stared back. Then it moved. Towards you. A shrill, not quite scream, noise came out of your throat of its own accord. The snake stopped. 

"Y/N, it's alright!" Ezira rushed to sit next to you, hold you in his arms, "it's just Crowley!"

"That's..." you goggled at the massive serpent, "that's...impossible."

"I assure you, it's not. Look. Look at his eyes." Ezira held his hand out towards the snake and once more it began to move forward.

Try as you might, you could scarcely wrap your mind around the fact that you just watched one of your boyfriends turn into an animal and that the animal in question should not inspire this instinctual fear in your belly. But you couldn't. You jumped when the snake's head came over the edge of the couch and settled into Ezira's lap. Said head was the size of a moderate lap dog.

One arm around you, Ezira petted the snake with his free hand and began to try and soothe you.

"Y/N, it's safe. It's okay. You know that this is Crowley. You saw him change. You can see it in his eyes. They are the same eyes. Look."

Shaking like a leaf, you did look into his eyes. Serpent's eyes, yellow with slits for pupils, same as what Anthony had revealed behind his glasses. And as you looked into them, there was something more. There was...emotion. There was worry, there was hope, as they met yours. It didn't completely put you at ease but nor did you feel like your heart was about to stop in sheer panic.

You didn't do anything. Just watched Ezira and the snake, the trace of Ezira's hand petting over and over again the top of the snake's head. It was like that for a while, just letting yourself be held by Ezira. Despite everything going on, being in his arms made you feel comforted, even if you were confused and scared.

When some of the trembling lessened, "Ca..." you cleared your throat, "that's Anthony?" You asked very quietly, and when Ezira said yes, you continued, "can I pet him too?" It felt stupid to say it but watching Ezira petting the snake...Anthony...grounded this somehow.

"Of course you may. He likes being petted." When you didn't make a move, Ezira reached over and gently took one of your hands and brought it over despite how tightly wound it was.

He extended your fingers with his own and with both your hands twined, brought it down onto the head, and began to pet.

"It's...it's like when I went to a zoo...when I was a kid," a building numbness crept into your mind. Your heart slowing, your muscles growing loose "there...there was an animal trainer. He let us pet some of the animals. He...he had a snake too. Not as big as this," you choked on a half-hysterical giggle, "but it feels the same. All...smooth and bumpy and cool in one go."

Your vision blurred. You blinked and..."Oh...oh, I'm...I'm sorry. I..." tears flowed, thick and silent, down your face. 

"Y/N," Ezira stilled the petting and you tugged your hand back, "don't be sorry. It's okay. It's a lot to take in."

You hugged back into yourself, burying your face into your knees, unsure of this horrible combination of stunned numbness and nauseating anger and fear in your stomach. All of these vague concepts that made your stomach clench, churned in the back of your mind, wanting to take shape, make you think and think hard. About life, death, heaven, hell...

"I want to lay down. I want to lay down. I want to lay down." You began to rock back and forth, "I think that... a lot's happened and I need to lay down for a while."

"Of course," Anthony's voice.

You peeked over your knees to see both of your lovers (Anthony human...well...human-looking once more).

"I...I'm not sure if I want you there or not. I...I don't know what I'm feeling right now." You said, your voice sounding distant to your own ears.

"We would never harm you," Ezira assured you quickly.

"Never," Anthony added.

You shook your head, sniffling, "It's not that. It's just...I don't know how to feel about you both right now. I don't want to be alone but I don't know if I want to be with you right now...I don't know. I..." your voice broke and you buried your face once more.

"Take your time," Ezira soothed, "whatever you'd like."

You did take your time and sat there, hugging yourself and rocking in place, trying to figure out what you wanted to do.

Eventually, you settled on, "I'd...I'd like to lay down in the bed with you both, and just...just sleep for a while." 

You got to your feet, sluggish and drained, and headed to the bedroom, the other two following you, "there are clothes all over the bed...don't worry about it. We can just...shove them off or something."

"We'll take care of it," Anthony said behind you and you heard a snap.

When you got to the bedroom, all of the clothes were gone. You refused to think about it. You were going to turn your brain off, you were going to sleep and when you woke up, it would all look and feel better. You'd be able to get your head around it. You would. You would.


	11. Mind Soothed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brief but at least something. It's been a rough time for me lately but I sincerely hope that you are all doing well.

Your head rose and fell with Ezira's breath, his heart a steady rhythm beneath your ear. You felt Anthony shift, his face nuzzling into your shoulder blades, his long arm draped over both of you and Ezira.

With a yawn, you opened your eyes. The bedroom was cast in dim blue from the moon pouring through the windows. Lifting your head you looked for a clock. You spotted yours and Anthony's cellphone on the side table. Too far away unless you decided to move and wake them up.

Everything so calm and quiet, you settled back down, feeling...normal. Comfortable, warm, safe, and perfectly normal. Anthony's little snores and soft sounds, Ezira's soft body beneath you. Any other night you'd spent in their embrace.

You were right, the sleep helped soothe your anxiety enough that you'd be able to talk to them when the time came. You closed your eyes, focusing on them, their very human feeling bodies, their very human breathing. Not human, you reminded yourself. But, maybe, you'd be able to keep your promise and human enough would be good enough and you could love them as you'd always had.


End file.
